I am a seriously flawed human being

I like ice cream too much. Way too much.

I will stare into the mirror, making faces, when I should be doing something productive with myself.

I say I'll call, but I never do.

When I fried chicken tonight, I didn't cook some of it all the way, something I didn't discover until I took a big bite.

I spend too much money on shoes I never wear and purses I never carry.

When I'm at home, I sing-song almost half of what I say.

Sometimes, I forget to clean my ears.

If Eric leaves, say for instance, a McDonald's bag in the bathroom floor, I will walk past it without picking up so I can go nag him about picking it up.

I get angry and think about beating people up a lot.

I do not put my cd's and dvd's back in their cases, so they are piled up by the hundreds.

I can't keep my hands off my hair.

I feel an intense dislike for stupid people.

I rarely dust. I own about a million knick knacks, and they are all insanely dusty.

I haven't spoken to my mother in three years, and I hid from my grand-parents for two years.

Sometimes I tell my cats I hate them. Sometimes I really do.

At this very second, there are four industrial light bulbs sitting in my floor. I have been stepping around them for a week. That's pretty lazy.

I start projects that I never finish.

I laugh at people that mis-pronounce words.

When I injure myself, I mention it constantly. I do it mostly to irritate people.

I still refuse to learn to drive.

Sometimes I drink too much.

Sometimes I laugh too obnoxiously.

I fall asleep during movies.

I snore, and sometimes I drool. I also talk in my sleep.

I put too much cream and sugar in my coffee.

I smoke too much.

I get obsessed with something for months, then quickly lose interest.

I tortured my sister when she was little.

I beat up my mom. And my dad.

I'm too lazy to pack a lunch.

None of these things bother me very much.