Sweet shit at the pawn shop

This is a list of awesome things that have happened since I started here

1. I met a man who was trapped in a coal mine for 3 hours. "I didn't much like it" was how he described the experience.

2. The one-earred guy I work with explained to me that mozzerella is a kind of cheese.

3. We are located by a mental health facility, and have lots of clients from the facility come in for free coffee. My favorite is Brother Otis Roads. He dresses like Andre 3000 and always carries an umbrella. While buying knee-pads one day(for what I don't know) he explained that many places sell machine guns under the counter to drug lords. On another occasion, he expressed his love of Hitachi televisions & his desire to build an entire wall of them. In the same conversation, he explained how a guitar works & how to start a band like Van Halen or Motley Crue. It confused me that he named those bands as he is a very old black man.

4. A sweaty dope fiend rushed into the store & asked if anyone had sold PSP games. I said no. He told me that if they had, he wanted them arrested. I explained that he should file a police report, & he wanted me to do it. When I explained that I was not a police officer & could not do that, he was very confused.

5. The jeweler I work with told me about the time he shook hands with Howard Hughes. He then went on to explain that Hughes tool was manufacturing a huge ocean drill, to be used for mining. The government later found out that it was just a giant vacuum cleaner that Hughes was using to suck ancient ship wrecks out of the ocean. I don't know how valid this story is, but I like it anyway.

6. I have listened to 75 or more deer hunting stories.

7.I met a man who builds his own guns & has a cannon that he enjoys shooting on holidays. This same man told me about the brutal murder of his parents in what I believed to be a casual conversation about the weather.

8. We are known as the cop shop, due to our law enforcement ties. Cops always hang out here to drink coffee & eat peanuts. I had never interacted with cops on an informal basis. Turns out, some of them aren't so smart.

9. A man walked in to the shop & asked to speak to my uncle. When told he wasn't here, he launched into a diatribe about Jimmy Carter being the most honest president & the republicans ruining the country. He got progressively louder, and after 15 minutes, he was red-faced, shouting, & spit was flying everywhere. It was awesome.